Adam Miller contra Jason Davis
Euthyphro: So no doubt you saw in the paper, Socrates, that Adam Miller has re-injured his finger?
Socrates: Old news, lad.
Euthyphro: No, again. If only he could stay healthy.
Socrates: Perhaps we could say: If only he were good.
Euthyphro: But he is good, Socrates. He throws 97—he's the best pitching prospect the Tribe has had since Sonny Siebert!
Socrates: Would you say he is better than Francisco Cabrera?
Euthyphro: Of course. No comparison.
Socrates: Cabrera threw 97 as well, and had great promise that never materialized.
Euthyphro: But Cabrera never could put it all together. He was maddening, for all his inability to harness his talent.
Socrates: And Miller? When has he "put it all together?" In Arizona? Years ago in Winter Haven? He has better control than Cabrera but is less of a pitcher.
Euthyphro: But Socrates ...
Socrates: There is no difference between the profligacy of Miller's talent and the waste of Jason Davis'. Or if there is a difference it is simply one of location. Did we not once have great hopes for Jason Davis? Did we not see in him the future of our bullpen?
Euthyphro: Yes, of course, but he had a chance to throw and was found wanting. Miller never gets to the mound at all.
Socrates: And your point is?
Euthyphro: Well, it's not fair.
Socrates: Life isn't fair, Euthyphro. In terms of results, Miller cannot throw strikes any more than David Aardsma. Therefore, Adam Miller cannot pitch, and therefore he sucks just as much as Jason Davis.
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Euthyphro: Socrates, please allow me to amend my characterization of a good pitcher. Since he has not been bad while pitching, as Jason Davis and Fernando Cabrera has amply demonstrated, he cannot be a bad pitcher. For bad pitchers pitch badly, and since Adam Miller hasn’t pitched badly, he cannot be a bad pitcher. And since he therefore is not a bad pitcher, he is not in the same category as Jason Davis and Fernando Cabrera.
Socrates: Well, now, I will have to give this new postulation some thought. I will not deny that Fernando Cabrera is a bad pitcher – my eyes saw Cabrera pitching against the Scythians in the World Funeral Games. But let us examine more closely your assertion that a pitcher who has not pitched badly is not a bad pitcher….
by Ryan on Mar 17, 2009 11:26 PM EDT reply actions 8 recs
Socrates: If the definition of a good pitcher is someone who does not pitch badly, then you may be right. But this is a definition by negation: defining by what it is not. It is like defining an image by its background, or by its shadow. I suggest the positive definition: good pitchers pitch well, and by this measure Adam Miller is not a good pitcher, having not pitched at all.
by odradek on Mar 18, 2009 12:23 AM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
Socrates pretty much pwned all his adversaries, at least according to Plato. The dialogues were the forerunners of the Harlem Globetrotters vs. Washington Generals.
by Ryan on Mar 18, 2009 2:47 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Socrates takes a beating in the Parmenides, though. Shapiro is always able to get the third man.
by FranklinScott on Mar 18, 2009 5:06 PM EDT up reply actions
Is this about chopping off Jason Davis’s finger and attaching it to Adam Miller’s hand?
Ben Francisco's only fan on LGT
by Toxicadam on Mar 17, 2009 11:42 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs
READ THIS SOLOFF!!!
"...leading the league in most offensive categories. Including nose hairs."
by sarcasmdave on Mar 18, 2009 12:57 AM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
SECOND!!
"Mixed emotions. Rather see him hit PEDroia [with that pitch]. I don’t care if he is in the dugout"
by Gradysmanldy on Mar 18, 2009 4:32 PM EDT up reply actions
I remember thinking that Davis could turn out to be more important to the team’s future than Sabathia. A long time ago.
Well, that's just, like, your opinion, man.
By doing what? Being the one who convinces CC to stop having food and championships handed to him?
Travis Hafner is overrated. Clarity is underrated. David Dellucci is David Dellucci.
The craziness that is the Indians pitching staff reminds me of a quote from Henry Brooks Adams, “Order is the dream of man while chaos is the law of nature.” So true, so true . . .
by Les Fleurs Du Mal on Mar 18, 2009 1:17 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Also! I shot this over to Craig at Shysterball, and he has seen fit to link it.
by Pronktastic on Mar 18, 2009 10:53 AM EDT up reply actions
That’s kind of the thing. I think he’s got some questions to answer on this.
by NickFantana on Mar 19, 2009 10:15 AM EDT up reply actions

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