Soylent green is people (6/2/2011)

I think I've finally figured out what month it is...

PULGT

The New Yorker recently reported on new research in the field of quantum computing. The physicist profiled in the piece is a proponent of a marginal theory called Many Worlds, which suggests that increases in computing power of a certain magnitude support the coexistence of an ever-expanding network of parallel universes, which form anew during instances of random atomic chance. The upshot, according to the physicist, is that beyond a certain threshold, computing power must be attributed to collaboration between universes, since no single universe could possibly play host to a force of computation that exceeded the number of atoms in that universe alone. If the theory proves correct, different universes could thus bear the burden of discrete computations.

The most logical follow-up question to this research is whether we are seeing just such a phenomenon with the 2011 Indians; i.e., is this team’s success in whole or in part a consequence of active collaboration between the current roster and rosters in other worlds? Has Asdrubal benefited from hitting tips given by PULGT Brandon Phillips? Josh Tomlin from the clubhouse energy of PULGT Yovani Gallardo (acquired in the 2006 Jason Davis deal that failed to happen)?

Might it even be possible that certain batting lines are in fact direct consequences of pinch-hit appearances or spot-starts by PULGTs invisible to the box score? (This would lend credence to an ancient hypothesis about the existence of "intangibles.") A number of prominent baseball writers, as you know well, have discounted the Indians’ record this season, pointing to intuition and to certain statistical models. Some have even suggested that the Detroit Tigers truthfully lead the AL Central. Perhaps these analysts are windbags, or perhaps they know something we don’t about the basis of the Indian’s success so far. Namely, that it depends on a roster composed not of 40 men but of of 40 men to the 5000th power. Perhaps Keith Law has inside knowledge that somewhere Pythagoras himself – not a calculation merely bearing his name – is a leading skeptic of our rotation’s prospects in the second half.

Thank you, Ryan, for this provocative notion.

by Forever Magallanes on Jun 2, 2011 1:57 AM EDT reply actions   21 recs

If you never comment again, you will stand as the Jamie Quirk of LGT commenters.

by InfiniteMonkeyTypists on Jun 2, 2011 7:38 AM EDT up reply actions   3 recs

The quirks of quarks, and boson’s mates,
Existing in all quantum states;
Now lashed, entwined, intensify
The sting of swings of Wahoo guys,
And Wahoo’s flings toward the plate.

As Wahoo circumnavigates
The AL, which he inundates,
Opponents raise a hue and cry:
"We simply can’t believe our eyes!
Our hurlers fail; our swings are late."

We might require a million Yeats
To declaim what Wahoo creates,
When a germ of Sockalexi
Can infinitely multiply;
I’ll merely say that it’s been great.

by YoDaddyWags on Jun 2, 2011 9:32 AM EDT up reply actions   4 recs

Same here, except instead of mowing the lawn, I was drinking a beer and eating tacos.

by Brick. on Jun 2, 2011 9:28 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions   4 recs

True story A newsroom assistant walked by my desk this morning and saw me on LGT. "Oh, nice," he said. "I’m on Pinstripe Alley."

"You shouldn’t admit to that," I said.

Silence. Finally, "Why not?"

I said nothing. He added, "I’m one of the few smart posters there."

by tabler84 on Jun 1, 2011 8:41 PM EDT reply actions   7 recs

This is totally mitchin’.

by gte619n on May 31, 2011 9:19 PM EDT reply actions   4 recs

Got up at 5.40am to watch, was back in bed at 5.46am!

One day I'll get over to watch the Tribe play

by new zealand tribe fan on May 25, 2011 5:08 PM EDT reply actions   10 recs

Sidenote: Adam Miller promoted to Akron last night.

by mcrose on May 27, 2011 11:57 AM EDT reply actions   8 recs

ESPN: Red Sox player hurts himself falling over a base —> but that would mean a member of the Sox did something wrong —> Cleveland has to be to blame —> The weather is crummy —> Cleveland’s fault.

by supersizeme on May 23, 2011 10:19 PM EDT reply actions   4 recs

FredOx traded to OTM

"Lotta heart in Cleveland." - Ian Hunter

by Denver Tribe Fan on May 27, 2011 7:37 PM EDT reply actions   4 recs

i’d prefer Albert Belle.

by peter m on May 24, 2011 2:11 PM EDT up reply actions   4 recs

Asdrubal Cabrera hit more home runs yesterday than Eduardo Perez did in 43 games as a Mariner.

by FredOx on May 23, 2011 4:20 PM EDT reply actions   20 recs

I’d make the same offer, but I need mine just in case I cross paths with Keith Law.

Trombone/creamy/soda.

by junkballer on May 22, 2011 10:38 PM EDT up reply actions   7 recs

Daniel "No Holds" Bard

Len Barker Perfect Game Attendee

by PortlandVinny on May 23, 2011 11:17 PM EDT reply actions   4 recs

Somewhere in Wicsonsin, Bob Wickman just hoisted a Leinenkugel in honor of Chris Perez.

"I’ll happily embrace elevated hopes if that is the price to pay." - APV

On Twitter at @grantgw - sports and Cleveland and Columbus stuff

by woodsmeister on May 23, 2011 10:56 PM EDT reply actions   3 recs

Let me get this straight, Chuck doesn’t like some curmudgeon who refuses to listen to any evidence against his opinion because said curmudgeon just knows that his opinion is correct. Interesting.

by 7foot3 on May 27, 2011 10:17 AM EDT up reply actions   6 recs

I really don’t know why I looked this up, but I did. There have been five different uniform combinations, given that they wear the blue script both at home (with the blue and red Wahoo) and on the road (with the blue Wahoo):

White Script/Wahoo     9-3
Blue Script/Home Wahoo 2-1
Blue Script/Road Wahoo 6-4
White Block/Red C      7-2
Grey Block/Blue C      6-7

This suggests at first glance that the road greys are the truly unlucky uniforms, which may be why they haven’t been worn for six straight road games. To remove the road bias, we can look at the percentage of home or road losses each combination represents. The White Script combo is performing as expected. It’s been worn in half of the home games and reflects half of the home losses. The White Block and Road Blues are luckier than average, with positive differentials of 4% and 7% respectively. The Home Blues and Road Greys are bad luck, with negative differentials of 4% and 7% respectively.

by FredOx on May 26, 2011 11:36 AM EDT up reply actions   9 recs

bartolo looks like a wax sculpture of himself.

by emil minty on May 23, 2011 7:17 PM EDT up reply actions   3 recs

It is called the Buchholz Effect. It takes forever.

by McWahoo on May 23, 2011 8:40 PM EDT up reply actions   3 recs

or was it pedroia’s exit music?

by SanD on May 23, 2011 10:20 PM EDT up reply actions   4 recs

#suckitLaw

by emily522 on May 23, 2011 10:42 PM EDT reply actions   5 recs

ENJOY YOUR GODDAMN STEAK DINNER, MAN

My watch is broken... it's stuck on Tribe Time
#suckitLaw

by Turkmenbashi on May 23, 2011 10:47 PM EDT up reply actions   4 recs